I’m 17, and I work in a day care, and there is this kid that I don’t know what to do with. He’s 9 and just like will not listen to anyone. If you ask him to do anything, he will do the oppsite just to spite you. If you tell him to do something simple like sit down, he will punch, hit, kick, etc. He is also violent with the other kids. He’s not nice to them either, he will take their toys, rip their paper if they are coloring, etc. I don’t know what to do…all I do is just try to ignore him, and if he hurts another kid or something I will try to put him in time out, but he won’t stay, and eventually I just give up. None of the other workers know what to do either, they are all basically doing the same thing as me. I tried talking to his mother once, I politely asked her if there was anything else or anything special I should be doing to help him, as I wanted him to have a good, fun time while he was there, and she really just gave me a bunch of bull about how many problems he has and what low self esteem he has and stuff like that. I really don’t know what to do. I really like my job and don’t want to quit. and I really am good with kids…it’s just this one particular kid that is so out of control. And it’s really not as if he can be asked to leave either, as this is a community daycare, run by a church at no cost to the parents. I’m really at a loss of what to do. Any productive advice would really be appreciated! thanks so much!
and so sorry this is so long. I’m just so frusterated…it’s such a battle every time he comes in.
I have a cousin just like this that I wound up having to go to pre-school with so I could remove him from problems and discipline him because the teachers didn’t want to take the time. He might very well have emotional issues and low self esteem, and you should treat this information like it matters, however that is not a reason for him to be violent and destructive. Did his mom have any suggestions for you? Don’t give up trying discipline him because it’s hard. Make sure you explain to him why he is in time out and when time is up have him tell you why he was there. An idea that has helped in elementary schools I’ve worked in; have the whole group sit down for a dicussion on rules and treating each other kindly. Have them come up with a few rules for daycare and write them on a big piece of poster board. Below the rules, have all the kids sign their names and repeat the rules. During this time tell them all what consequences for breaking rules are. If you have a broken rule remind the offending child that they signed a contract saying they would follow the rules and now they have a consequence for breaking it.
Rules:
1. Respect yourself.
2. Respect others.
3. Respect property.
4. Listen when an adult is talking.
Consequences:
1. Time out
2. Privileges/toys/games get taken away
If this child continues to be violent and is causing harm to others and/or himself, you need to speak with the program director. Community daycare or not, you shouldn’t have to explain to parents why their child is coming home with black eyes and bruises. You could also request a meeting time with the child’s mother. It’s tough to have to tell a parent that their child is a problem, but you need to be able to handle this kid. Be respectful to Mom and tell her you understand her son has some problems and that must make things hard for both of them, but he is hurting other kids and that is not acceptable.
please helphttp://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;…
talk to your Director -you have very specific rules to follow with discipline. Yahoo cannot help you.
quit your job
Low esteem my eye. It’s called spoiled brat who gets what he wants at home and mom is too butt lazy to do anything anymore to stop him.
You need to document the occurrances and turn them in to the director. Check the policy to see if children can be removed for things like you’ve described because he sounds like he is a bully and physically harmful to other children. If so ask that the center take appropriate action to remove him. The other workers also act as witnesses to his antics can back you up if asked.
Sounds to me like what this kid needs is a good sound spanking, some rules at home and anger counselling to boot. Unfortunately you can’t give him anything but rules to follow at the center and consequences you’re allowed to use there when he breaks them.
This kid sounds like trouble, but it is not your fault. you and the other workers need to get together and work on getting this boy out of yall workplace because he is harming yall and the other kids. he has got to go! do a petition or something to remove him from the daycare because this is not good for business. if all else fails you might just have to quit.
I work in a daycare as well, and I feel your pain.
Don’t listen to the person who suggested you are a bad person for this. The daycare I work in is a church daycare as well, and you can’t help it if this kid keeps coming in. You are trying your best I know, but there are some things you could be doing better. When he misbehaves, don’t lose your cool, speak calmly and tell him what he did wrong, then put him in timeout. If he leaves, put him back in. If you are letting him get away with leaving he will just keep doing it, and never learn from his mistakes. Also, if you don’t punish him for his physical misbehavior you are also teaching the other kids in the room that it is okay, and they may begin to do it as well, then you will really have a situation on your hand. Are you by yourself or in teams for each room? If you have another person in there with you, make sure you two get together and develop a plan for him, and you both really need to stick to it. Talk to mom again, if this continues, I infer that mom didn’t give you any advice before? If it’s been awhile since you last asked her, approach her and say something along the lines of, I know you were sending him to a specialist, has the specialist said anything? Do you have any tips for me? I like how you worded it before, when talking to mom. You don’t want to come off the wrong way to her. Just be consistent and keep going with him, you don’t want to give up, because he’s only 9 and so much progress can be made. good luck.
Inform the director and let the director know that it will be child abuse by not letting this kid get help. This kid needs some help. No one can kick the teacher and care-giver. If you loose your job make sure you write a long report of all his behaviour and keep a log. Make sure you give it to social services too. Parents must take care of this kid. They have to get help for the kid. It is very disturbing. i just hope there is no kid like this on my child’s day care and no teacher like you who is trying to save her job and exposing other kids to such a monster of a kid. If your boss doesn’t get a parent teacher meeting with the parent then i would report on her/him too. I need responsible teachers if the parents are not.
my nefew was kind of like this.
if there is a empty room then whenever he throws a tantrum then put him in there and close the door til you hear him stop. once he has settled down go in and politely ask him if he’s done. Continue this process until he will settle down completely. Go in and talk to him, see if there is any problems(home, kids at daycare, ect) it helped with my nefew so much.
Good Luck
in my opinion get another job cuz that’s the way some kids are and i have an almost 11 yr old that i could pull out her hair sometimes but that’s not possible. They’re just kids and they’re only acting out with the situations that are put forth before them and them coming to u like that maybe that something else is going on with him and he doesn’t know how to react.
Don’t let a problem like that discourage you from a job that you love.
If the boy does something inappropriate, scold him. Give him three tries if he breaks them, time out. Then STICK TO IT.
If he gets up take him back and the time starts over. Tell him this.
When he is behaving nicely and getting along well with everyone praise him warmly. (I like how nicely your playing, good work etc) If he doesn’t respond to that then increase the time he spends in punishment. He’ll get it eventually. Don’t ignore his behavior as it is likely a cry for attention but also don’t get angry. Keep your cool.